Ryan Seacrest....death by sharkbite

Well not really, but I would have enjoyed that story:

American Idol” host and executive producer of the abominations that are the Denise Richards and Dina Lohan reality shows, Ryan Seacrest, suffered a minor shark bite over the weekend.

Asked by his radio co-host if anyone else got bit, Seacrest lamented: “No, just me, of course! There were like 1,000 people in the ocean, and I get bit by the shark!”(celebitchy.com)

"No just me, of course!" Listen frostylocks, you have Forrest Gumped yourself into a multimillion dollar career and you say some shit like that?! You ungrateful bastard. It could have taken your whole leg and you would still be considered the luckiest son of bitch on the planet.