Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Holy Crap!

USA Today says that the police in Pasadena, TX were called to a home by a man claiming his wife fried up their goldfish and ate 'em up after an argument. When they arrived, they found a plate with four fried goldfish on it. The crazy bitch admitted that she ate 3. (
Daaaamn!!! That bitch is hard core! I usually go for the passive aggressive thing when I fight with my significant other before I burst into tears and get my way. I am sure eating the pets works too.

Kanye Is Being a Bitch Again

According to reports, the rapper showed up over the weekend to Common’s highly publicized benefit show at the Hollywood Palladium, and threw another one of his egotistical tantrums backstage.
The rapper was allegedly upset over his not being offered food while in the dressing room backstage. After spotting a man eating chicken, West blurted, “Why wasn’t I offered chicken? You want me to perform for free, [and] everyone is eating… why am I not eating?”
When the waitress explained that he never asked for food, ‘He yelled, “Well, I’m asking now!” After receiving chicken, he allegedly proceeded to take a bite and then throw the rest in the trash. Meanwhile, the rapper’s beau Amber Rose, stood silent, while other celebrities backstage watched in awe. (

Hmm, this is another one that just writes itself. Insert racial joke here. 


I love so many things about Facebook. Sharing pictures with friends and family. Getting updates on old friends with a quick visit to their page. But, one thing I hate is when people use it as a Soapbox like they are Glenn Beck or Rachel Maddow. Facebook is a social website. Social, not anti-social. This is not the place to spread political rhetoric no matter what it is. Mine included. If you are going to do that, make it a separate page from your personal page. I am not going to take you seriously while your main page has you throwing up devil horns, drinking a Corona. Don't do this unless you want negativity all over that little space called the comment box unless you are really ready for the fight of your life. The kind where keyboards and the comfort of your own living room are vital training spaces. You know, like pussies.

J Minus J

After a rocky three-year relationship, Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel have called it quits, Us Weekly reports in its latest issue (on newsstands now).
A mutual pal of the pair tells Us Weekly that Timberlake, 28, has told friends, “it’s over,” and that he ended it for good — over the phone.
“It was about a month ago,” the pal says.
While he was in NYC in September to show his William Rast clothing line at Fashion Week, “Justin was clearly on the hunt,” the pal tells Us Weekly.
Meanwhile, Biel, 27, is in “severe denial and won’t accept” the split, their mutual pal tells Us Weekly. Another source says, “There’s no way of knowing if it’s a firm breakup, because with them it’s so hot and cold.” (

The story goes on to say how Justin is boning Rihanna and Jessica is crying her eyes out in denial. I want to know why all these stories always have the woman in the relationship as the victim? Has anyone seen Jessica Biels body? Have you all forgotten? I understand Justin has a mean falsetto but Jessica is a hot chick with a really nice ass, I doubt she will be crying for long. Besides, she might crush you in between her solid rock thighs if you keep talking shit.

Bush Still Makes Me Chuckle

Apparently there’s no room for fantasy in the former president’s view, especially when it comes to children’s lit. Former Bush speechwriter Matt Latimer revealed that the president refused to give Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling the Presidential Medal of Freedom because her books “encouraged” witchcraft. The same argument given by close minded pro-censorship folks everywhere.

I really don't have anything to add to that. The story is funny enough, no punch line needed.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

In A World...

where ugly guys can get very hot girls like Jermaine Dupri can get Janet jackson and still cheat on them here is the story of Jennifer Love Hewitt and Jamie Kennedy.
Despite Internet rumors, Jennifer Love Hewitt and Jamie Kennedy, who costar on the CBS drama The Ghost Whisperer, are still going strong, his rep tells “impeccable sources,” blogger Perez Hilton has claimed that Kennedy, 39, “has been cheating on Jennifer Love Hewitt with his ex-girlfriend, Shannon Funk.” (

How he even got her I don't know. Don't say "oh he's funny!" She is beautiful and successful and this goofy bastard cheats on her? He is a costar on her show. A costar on HER show. That is not an analogy, that's for real. Idiot

Kanye Goes To Rehab??

Before Kanye West rushed the stage at the MTV Video Music Awards, the singer was filmed on the awards show’s red carpet drinking Hennessey cognac straight from the bottle. Now, the next logical thing has happened: people are talking about West going to rehab. (

I am going to say he is not an alcoholic. He is just a douchebag with a bottle, like a baby.


According to a tip received by Cinema Blend, the studio is preparing to replace Depp if/when he decides to abandon ship. This may not happen with “On Stranger Tides,” as Disney is likely prepared to offer him as much money as it takes to keep him aboard. The actor, who is said to be aware the last two movies “sucked,” will definitely not be sticking around for the fifth and sixth installments if the tipster is to be believed. (

Well, Disney screwed the pooch with this one. How are they going to keep a movie franchise afloat without their major star signed on? Johnny Depp made the last two Pirate movies palatable

Britney Releases Greates Hits.....Again

Hmmm. since she last released a Greatest Hits Compilation she has had three great hits. So is this going to include her previous great hits or those three songs?
That would explain the title of her new single, 3. No, actually it does not. This lil' ditty' is about Britney getting down with two other babes. I repeat, the song is about Britney having sex with two other girls. That is just so titillating and erotic, and so fresh too. No girl has ever tiptoed the line of bisexuality, ever.

Monday, September 28, 2009

I Feel Bad For You

Congratulations to newlyweds Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom! A rep for the 25-year-old reality star confirms exclusively to OK! that the couple were wed in the home of family friend and music-industry legend Irving Azoff on Sunday afternoon. (

I feel bad for Khloe. She is like the ugly step sister of two beautiful girls, except she is the fruit of the same loins. It seems unfair. She definitely got the short end of the stick in that gene pool. Khloe married this guy after a whole month of knowing each other. Tick tock on the divorce clock.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

What Ever Happened To...

licking the spoon when baking a cake? I remember being a kid and licking the spoon and the pan. I think if this now because it is my friends birthday and I am baking her a cake. I thought about my mom baking and how that was part of the fun. Now you can't because of salmonella and raw eggs or something like that. Did the eggs change? Did the chickens change? That seems really unfair. I lived on the wild side and I licked the spoon. If you don't hear from me assume the worst.