Friday, February 27, 2009

Mixed Messages

I am really confused by the messages some musicians and "rappers" are giving young women today. Neyo for instance has a lovely song by the name of Miss Independent. One of the verses actually says "her bills are paid on time." That's it? Pay your bills on time? He coos this like it is a sweet nothing. There are several songs that refer to women and their independence. A rapper named Webbie actually has a song that spells it out "I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T." I cannot repeat a verse because I have no idea what else he says. Jamie Foxx has a song titled " I Love Her Cause She Got Her Own." Really Jamie? Ok, I guess the message is clear. Bitches stop being so lazy, pay your bills on time that is truly the way to a man's heart.
But, then I hear T.I's song "Whatever You Like" and I am instantly confused. In the video he actually tells the girl at the fast food restaurant "you know you're too cute to be working here." Which I find incredibly offensive because this implies that she is too cute to work. His lyrics are much more romantic. "Brain so good coulda' sworn you went to college." So, give good head pretty girl you don't need to go to college....then "you can have whatever you liiiiike." Gross...

What Year Is This? 1912?

It’s freezing in Washington, D.C., in February.
But despite the chill, First Lady Michelle Obama is still exercising her constitutional fashion right to bare arms.
The first lady is becoming known for her casual sleeveless styles and impressive muscular arms, which we’ve glimpsed along the campaign trail and even on the cover of Vogue.
And she was bare-armed again last night when President Obama was addressing Congress for the first time.
“Oh my God,” Cindi Leive, Glamour editor, e-mailed the New York Times last night. “The First Lady has bare arms in Congress, in February, at night!”
Obama’s super-sculpted arms are reportedly well-earned. She started working out with a personal trainer a few years ago.
In recent years, she’s kept up her exercise regimen a few times a week — cardio and lifting weights, or doing Saturday training sessions with the same trainer who kept her husband in shape on the campaign trail.
Now her strong arms getting international attention as they slowly come to symbolize the inner strength of Americans, particularly American women.
Either that or Michelle is just a big fat Madonna copy cat. What do you think of Michelle Obama’s bare arms? Is it proper or disrespectful? Is it admirable or shameless? (La Times)

All of these events were indoors so it is most likely she had a coat on. So, if she was wearing a long sleeve blouse in the summer time would that be considered inappropriate? It is not as if the First Lady is wearing a plunging neckline or a short tight skirt or looks disrespectful in any way so why all the hoopla? Stop being so angry people. We haven't had a First Lady that could rock her biceps since....ever? Imagine Barbara Bush rocking a halter top. Got the vision? Now suck on that for a while and embrace the tone.
Oh and the whole "they come to symbolize inner strength of Americans? Who is the journalist that wrote that pile of dog shit? It's like in Forrest Gump when everyone is asking him "why are you running?" "Are you running for World Peace?" "Are you running for Women's Rights?"
"I just felt like running."

Thursday, February 26, 2009

An Open Letter To The Guy Who Parked Behind Me In The No Parking Zone At The Grocery Store

Dear Owner of a Black GTI With an Apple Sticker On Your Hatchback Window (douchebag),
I know you believe in God, because he was the one thing that stopped from ramming my car into yours last night. Asking God for patience was all I could do to keep my cart from just rolling into your shiny black drivers side door. It's not like you didn't deserve it. You blocked my exit, you blocked the pavement between the cement grassy areas that is specially made for my cart to go through. If you could only have witnessed the chaos you caused for about 15 minutes in that parking lot but no you were tucked safely inside of the store. Far away from me. I considered pulling a Fried Green Tomatoes, but like I said God told me not to.
If I could take back that moment in time, I would have patiently waited and beat you with the loaf of french bread I know you were buying instead I walked away. But, if this is where you shop regularly I will be looking for you. I will find you....and I will cut you.
Hugs and Kisses,

Kim Kardashian Adopts Monkey....Just In Time To Make Headlines

This is her explanation, please tell me what is wrong with this way of thinking:

“I understand my timing was not appropriate and it was insensitive of me, so I want to explain,” she blogs. “The pictures I posted are from six months ago when we were filming season three of Keeping Up With the Kardashians. I had held onto these pictures for months and preset them to run the month before my show was going to air, to give you guys exclusive glimpses into season three.“My mom has been begging Kourtney, Khloe and I to settle down and have kids, so we thought it would be funny to rent a baby chimpanzee for a week and leave her with my mom! We don’t still have Suzy, she was just rented for a week! You guys will see what happens this season with Suzy!" (

You rented a monkey for a week because your mom is begging for grandchildren? You know, I like you Kim. I really do. When you are standing there in all those pictures posing quietly, you are so lovely and then you go and do something like this. Like opening your mouth, that just makes me sigh and want to pat you on the head before I grab the duct tape to stop you from saying one more stupid thing.
Tyler Durden asked a question this week regarding a really beautiful bikini model to the likes of "how can someone like Sarah Jessica Parker be a famous actress and not this girl?" Well, here is your answer Tyler.

The Good, The Bad, The Very Ugly

It's amazing what you can get away with when you are respected in Hollywood:

Clint Eastwood believes the rise of political correctness is no laughing matter.
He says the world would be a better place if we could still laugh at inoffensive jokes about different races. The Hollywood actor and director, 78, said we live in constant fear of being labeled racist for simply laughing about national stereotypes.
‘People have lost their sense of humour,’ he told Germany’s Der Spiegel magazine.‘In former times we constantly made jokes about different races.
‘You can only tell them today with one hand over your mouth otherwise you will be insulted as a racist. I find that ridiculous. In those earlier days every friendly clique had a “Sam the Jew” or “Jose the Mexican” - but we didn’t think anything of it or have a racist thought.’
‘It was normal that we made jokes based on our nationality or ethnicity. That was never a problem… I don’t want to be politically correct. We’re all spending too much time and energy trying to be politically correct about everything.’ (

Well Clint, I believe that amongst a group of friends you may joke amongst yourselves about yourbackground or heritage. Believe me if I hear my black friends say one more joke about fried chicken, to their Jewish friend across the table, I as a spicy latina will vomitar (throw up). It is one thing amongst friends, but like how you say "in the earlier days", there was lynching as well as jokes so that tends to cause some sensitivity amongst some racial groups.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

WTF Is Canoodling?

It's probably just the fevered dreams of tabloid writers, but rumor has it that Paris Hilton was seen "canoodling" with Twilight hottie Robert Pattinson at the Rick Yorn and Patrick Weitzell Oscars after-party on Sunday night.
According to a source, "Paris and Rob were deep in conversation, being very flirtatious with each other, when Benji, Paris' ex approached. Paris was polite to Benji, but continued talking to Rob, and poor Benji slinked away." (

I hate to say it but Perez Hilton is usually right about gossip. He is annoying as hell but he is usually right. So that is why this story makes me weep. Why Edward why?? You could have any woman on the planet and yet you decide to take a ride on the town bicycle? What would Carlisle and Esme say? What is it about this girl? There has to be more than one slut in Hollywood right? Where is Sienna Miller when you need her????

At First When I See You Cry, It Makes Me Smile :)

In the wake of the Chris Brown and Rihanna incident, Chris Brown has lost his endorsements, his career, his girlfriend, his fans, his radio play, his dignity, and he may very well lose his life.
A music insider explains to the new issue of In Touch Weekly that "Chris is a marked man. He faces criminal charges and possible jail time, but he’s going to have to deal with Rihanna’s legion of fans and her close-knit friends in the industry."
And the leaked photo of Rihanna's battered face only fanned the flames. The insider added, "The threats started pouring in the moment that appeared online."(

I really should not be smiling regarding anyone's misery, especially death threats. But, I like the idea of him being at least a little fearful of getting his face half as busted up as hers is right now.

Hugh Jackman......sigh

I did not watch the Oscar's. I never do. I like to find out who won the next day, like Christmas and look at the pictures of all the pretty dresses ( Evan Rachel Wood. I don't like her but I appreciate the alabaster skin.), and the hideous shit (Beyonce. Stop letting your mother dress you when you have Versace' begging to adorn you.) So, I did not see Hugh Jackman dancing and singing and I really don't want to. I am glad that he is a well rounded entertainer but, it will taint my idea of Wolverine and I can't have that. But, then I heard that today he gave Barbara Walters a lapdance. That I had to take a looky loo at. I have to hand it to Bab Wawa, she is an old dame and if her heart can take even three seconds of that she is a much stronger woman than me.
Holy crap....Wolverine gives lap dances?

Shocking News!!!!

Megan Fox and fiance Brian Austin Green have split, has learned.
“The relationship had run its course,” an insider tells Us exclusively. “It’s completely amicable, and they are remaining friends.”
Fox, 22 (who’ll reprise her role as Mikaela in this June’s sequel Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen), and Green, 35 (a regular on Fox’s Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles), now “are both focusing on their careers,” the source adds.
The couple — who have tattoos of each other’s names — met in 2004 and, as Us first reported, got engaged in November 2006. (

Who did not see this one coming? What is she going to do now with that tattoo of his name by her naughty bits? Date another guy named Brian? Change it to Brain? No, that would be gross.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

I Dont' Usually Agree With Al Sharpton But....

NEW YORK - The New York Post is standing behind a cartoon that some have interpreted as comparing President Barack Obama to a violent chimpanzee gunned down by police. The cartoon in Wednesday's Post by Sean Delonas shows two police officers standing over the body of a bullet-riddled chimp. One of the officers says the other, "They'll have to find someone else to write the next stimulus bill."(

I really don't understand what it could mean besides a racist remark. Or, that the stimulus bill was proposed by a lunatic anthropoid with anxiety issues. You know the one that had to be killed? So, at the end of your little joke, Obama is killed? Hmm. What happens to the random reader that does not know the story of the pet monkey that mauled a woman the same day?
This is a very ugly way of mixing two stories that are in the public eye at the same time and it making the person who drew it look like someone that needs to be well, put down now just like that monkey. I never liked W. but a picture depicting his death if they tied it in with a camel would be in poor taste.

The Pope Really Has A Sense of Humor

VATICAN CITY - Pope Benedict, underscoring the Vatican's ruling on an issue that divides Americans, told U.S. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi on Wednesday that Catholic politicians and legislators cannot back abortion rights.
Pelosi, a powerful U.S. politician who is Catholic and pro-choice, has been accused by U.S. bishops in the past of misrepresenting Church teachings on abortion.(

Separation of church and state? Have you heard that one Papa? While you sit up there in your ivory tower passing judgement on some women's last resort there are unwanted children being born (like to Bristol Palin ahem) and are you going to help raise them? No of course not. Please pass around the basket because the man in the sky needs more money.
Oh and what was that other things Catholics should not do? Those bishops...could they be the same one's that closed an already blind eye to the sexual abuse by Catholic priest on young boys and relocated them to a different parish? Yeah you are not supposed to condone acts such as those.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Oh he said this too...

The rest of the article with this utterly enchanting artist goes something like this;
On having natural talent as a kid: “First beat I did was in seventh grade, on my computer. I got into doing beats for the video games I used to try to make. My game was very sexual. The main character was, like, a giant penis. It was like Mario Brothers, but the ghosts were, like, vaginas. Mind you, I’m 12 years old, and this is stuff 30-year-olds are programming. You’d have to draw in and program every little step—it literally took me all night to do a step, ’cause the penis, y’know, had little feet and eyes.”

On what makes him so hard-working: “People ask me a lot about my drive. I think it comes from, like, having a sexual addiction at a really young age. Look at the drive that people have to get sex—to dress like this and get a haircut and be in the club in the freezing cold at 3 A.M., the places they go to pick up a girl. If you can focus the energy into something valuable, put that into work ethic.”

Eww. I need a shower. Do girls think he is sexy? I mean does any female out there find him attractive? He gives me that same icky feeling that Diddy does. I'm just imagining him with playing with ghost vaginas at 12 years old, " it took me all night." Ugh, fuckin' creepy...

Kanye Said This.....

He is unbellievably charming. low key and humble I just had to put in all these exerpts...

On Kanye ready to pour all his “superhero” energy into conquering fashion: “Put this in the magazine: There’s nothing more to be said about music. I’m the f—ing end-all, be-all of music. I know what I’m doing. I did 808s in three weeks. I got it."
"The end all be all of music? Wow, somebody really has a healthy/delusional sense of self. Can this guy be more annoying? Yes he can....

On being the voice of the voice of this generation: “If not me, then who? Someone could be a better rapper, dance better. But culturally impacting? When you look back at these four and a half years, who’s the icon at the end of the day? Who broke down color barriers? What other black guy would a white person use as a fashion reference?”
You? You are the voice of this generation? Yeah maybe if we were all arrogant, self indulgent jackasses that believe that those red kicks are dope just because you are wearing them? Did you break down color barriers? You went on national television and said "George Bush does not care about black people." OK. It was true but that is not the point. Subtlety, elegance.
If you would stop tooting your own horn perhaps someone could stop throwing up in their mouth long enough to give you the kudos you so desperately need.
Oh and the thing about the "what other black guy could a white person use a a fashion reference?" That is incredibly racist and stupid as if all black people besides yourself only wear baggy jeans and wife beaters. Oh and it's wrong. John Legend, Michael Jordan, Taye Diggs...shit anybody. A green Lacoste shirt and pink sweater do not make you a fashion icon.

Friday, February 13, 2009


The Jonas Brothers recently let their secret nicknames;
Nick Jonas = "Mr. President"
Kevin = "K2"
Joe = "Danger"

I have no idea which is which because I am not a tween or whatever you call this generation of soft ass kids. Seriously how much hair gel is necessary to get that look? Joe whichever one you are....Danger? Danger, really?

Thursday, February 12, 2009


In a new interview, Twilight director Catherine Hardwicke says that she walked away from "more money than I [Hardwicke] or anyone in my family has ever seen" because she believed she could not remain faithful to the book and to fans under the restrictions that Summit wanted to put her under to direct the upcoming sequel, New Moon.
Turning down money in pursuit of artistic integrity?! In Hollywood?! That's crazy talk!
Twilight producers wanted to rush the sequel into production - which they are doing, and shooting begins next month. They also wanted to keep the budget at a modest figure.
Hardwicke disagreed with both of those things. (PEREZHILTON.COM)

Anyone who read the book, anyone who loved the book....then saw this stinker of a movie. I will just say it, this bitch is lying. She did not stay true Twilight at all. If that was her vision then she may as well be blind. I hope the new director follows the story line of New Moon even though it was not one of my favorites of all four novels.

Chris Brown Is One Classy Guy

Disgraced R&B star Chris Brown has made his first statement following his alleged beating of superstar girlfriend Rihanna - he posted an update on his private Facebook page reading: "You'll begin to see her true colors. Believe it!"
And it seems that the troubled singer has confirmed his split from the Barbadian beauty by changing his relationship status to 'single' (

Once again the place to air your woes is not Facebook, Myspace. When you have an actual agent and a spokesperson, perhaps that is the way to go. But, he is obviously not the sharpest knife in the drawer (thank God because he would have used that too) so this is to be expected. This punk has never even been in a bar fight. He literally went from "baby faced RnB cutie", to "beat the shit out of a girl until she is black and blue then leave the scene of the crime scumbag." Couldn't you have prepared us for this somehow Chris? Like a DUI, or like I previously mentioned a bar fight? You know with a man?

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

The Bitch With The 14 Kids...

That is all I will call her, besides crazy.
If one church helps her, if she gets one TV show, if I see her plastic surgery mangled face while her acrylic nails handle, excuse me pat, her 8 babies that are ALL in incubators.....I will literally pull out her ovaries with my bare hands.

If Anyone Deserves a Beatdown, It is Sean Penn

Sean Penn is sickened by his movie star peers who sign up to model for clothing companies and designers - because he thinks they should concentrate on acting.
The Oscar nominee has no time for stars who aren’t committed to acting 100 per cent, and he’s calling on those who want to be taken seriously to ditch their sideline jobs.
Penn tells the new issue of Rolling Stone magazine, “People are spending too much time modelling for some f**king clothing company instead of acting, and I resent it. It’s like, ‘Are you going to do the Chanel ad today? I thought you were in the middle of shooting a f**king movie.’
“Just let me know if you mean it. I want to know you’re trying to write the great American novel every time. Fail all you want, but f**king try.”(

You resent it? Do you Sean? I am sure you resent it because you pretty much resent everything from the sun coming up in the morning to the fact that your ugly mug will never be asked to be in an ad for anything. Ever. Unfortunately you delivered one of the best lines ever in a movie.
"Learnin' about Cuba and havin' some food." So, I resent myself for still loving that.

I Was Watching Walk the Line Last Night....

as I often do because I looooove that movie. Reese is so cute with her fake country accent...." y'all can't walk the line." Joaquin with brown contacts to cover his big baby blues to look like the real Johnny Cash and then I remembered....

Joaquin Phoenix doesn't want to be seen as a sex symbol anymore. He's now going on record to tell the world why he's gone back to basics.
People have called me a sex symbol in the past, but it's very much an effort. People know me as this kind of thing and in some ways I don't know that this is my look.
It's been important for me to just do something that's extreme - that really separates me from that public Joaquin Phoenix persona, whatever the f*** that is. (

Mission accomplished! I am officially flaccid.

Chris Brown, tsk tsk

Sunday night, R&B's hottest couple, Chris Brown and Rihanna, were supposed to light up the Grammys. Instead, the normally affectionate twosome were embroiled in a domestic violence drama that left Brown, 19, booked on felony criminal threats charges and posting $50,000 bail after turning himself in to the LAPD on Sunday at 6:34 p.m. PST. Sources say that Rihanna (real name: Robin Fenty), 20, was the victim in the alleged assault which occurred around 12:30 a.m. on Sunday. Responding to a 911 call about a disturbance, the LAPD took statements from a female with visible injuries, who named Brown as her attacker. (

I am hoping there is some type of mis-information regarding the very gory details. But, if any of this is true and he did beat her to a pulp? I don't care what she did, I don't care who she did...I hope his career is over. This is despicable, he is 19 years old and he beat his girlfriend to the point that she was hospitalized?
I truly and honestly hope Jigga beats the shit out of this kid. I am sure Beyonce' has deserved a slap now and then and he would still never raise his hand to a woman.

Monday, February 9, 2009

One Night of Passion equals $7,000,000

Eddie Murphy has to pay whole hell of a lot of $$$$$
The settlement will see Murphy shell out £35,000 ($US51,000)A MONTH until daughter Iris Angel turns 18 — a total of around £7 ($US10)MILLION.
We can also reveal that Eddie has finally agreed to see his 20-month-old child.
Spice Girl Mel and the Hollywood actor have spent 15 months warring in Los Angeles courts. She has been determined to force him to play a part in his child’s life.
Sources told News of the World that, under the terms of the deal, both have signed non- disclosure contracts preventing either from discussing the settlement in public.
But one of Scary Spice’s pals told us: “Mel is delighted that the case is over as she just wanted what was right for her girl.
“It was never about money — it was Mel’s way of asking Eddie to show consideration for Angel.”

It was never about money? Really? Well, then why not a realistic settlement, like oh $20,000 a month? It seems it is all about the money.
Bitches are evil and men are stupid. You put those kind of people together you get a child with major daddy issues and what does the mother get? Those implants she always wanted! Oh and she made a workout video. How am I supposed to take workout advice from someone who lounges around all day and spends someone else's money and because of the income she can workout five hours a day and afford a chef?

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Christian Bale Is Mad

He yelled at a grip on set for getting in the way of his scene. This went on for about 15 minutes and makes him seem like a lunatic....
That is all I have to say about that. (Kisses Batman on forehead). In my eyes, you can do absolutely no wrong. Sorry, he could slice my hand with a letter opener and I would probably be OK with that. I'm still mad at Katie Holmes for slapping him in Batman Begins.

Bitch Fight!!!

James, known for her rendition of the classic song “At Last,” lashed out at Beyonce during a recent concert, criticizing her Inauguration performance during which she sang “At Last” for President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama.
At a concert this week in Seattle, James said: “You guys know your president, right? You know the one with the big ears? Wait a minute, he ain’t my president, he might be yours, he ain’t my president. You know that woman he had singing for him, singing my song–she’s going to get her ass whipped.”
James continues, “The great Beyonce. I can’t stand Beyonce. She has no business up there, singing up there on a big ol’ president day, singing my song that I’ve been singing forever.”(

Ahem, Miss James no disrespect. Yes, you sang the shit outta' that song for years and congrats on that. Now, if the President who by the way is yours and mine and everyone else in this country chose Beyonce to sing it and not you then what do you think she is going to say to his request? She has every right to sing it because you, unfortunately, do not own it. There was a similiar issue like this when the movie Dreamgirls came around and Jennifer Hudson did her own rendition of the very popular "You're Gonna Love Me." Nobody listened to that lady either so holler all you want.

Speaking of Role Models....

Oh sweetness, please don't feel so bad.

"This is just a stupid thing of mine that I did, and I have to live with it," he said, telling the paper, too, that he is not a regular pot smoker. After last weekend's publication of the photo, which reportedly was taken in South Carolina last November, the local sheriff said he is looking into possible criminal prosecution against Phelps. "This was stupid," said the swimmer, "and I know this won't happen again. It's obviously bad judgment and it's something I'm not proud of at all. I will say that with the mistakes that I've made in my life, I've learned from them. Every one of them. And I've become a better person."

If anyone deserves to smoke some weed and chill out it's you kid. You were not hitting the bong during the Olympics....and if you were who gives a rat's ass??? Pot is not the most athletically enhancing drug so if you were smoking the pots and still won all those gold medals? You are still an amazing athlete. No asterisk, no nothing.

New Respect for Lil' Wayne

Anyone who knows me, or has ever read this blog, know of my disdain towards this annoying little man. But, I heard an excerpt from his interview with Katie Couric this morning....yeah Katie Couric the whitest woman in America and I loved his answer to the question that all reporters seem to love to ask anyone that is in the spotlight
"Do you consider yourself a good role model?"
To which he said something to the like of " I don't see myself as a role model for anyone Miss Katie (he called her that the whole interview). If you need someone to model your life after you have no reason to live. I have my two children and I do good for them, so I worry about them. Everyone has to worry about their own."

What would ever make her think to ask a guy...any guy with a tattoo on his forehead if he thinks he is a good role model? Oh and that he called her "Miss Katie" the whole time. It was sweet and crazy at the same time.
I also have to give kudos to Miss Katie, she must have been petrified. I know Barbara Walters would never demean herself by speaking to Lil' Wayne.